I think I’m now unemployable

I recently finished on another film. This one was actually a television series called Terra Nova . The first four episodes are approved to go ahead and if successful they’ll continue to produce an entire series. It’s a sci-fi about a dystopian future that is dangerous to live in so they transport (time travel) some people to the past. Basically it’s cars, guns and dinosaurs. Plenty of action but no real substance and I think it’ll probably be a success for many reasons. One of them is the production that I saw happening and what I’ve continued to realise from my previous post about the addiction of work.

As usual the standard of work that we were all doing was outstanding. I mean everyone, all the technicians on the ground and what they were managing to achieve says a great deal about the professionalism and expertise of the person on the shop floor who puts all the stuff together for the shoot crew to work with. It’s the reason that the work is of such a high standard that I find it interesting that dispute the difficulties, the job still gets done and the production gets what it wants.

Different to as it appears

Now my caveat – I only know my one little section in the art department and I don’t have the big picture so this is just from one of the grunts in the trenches. The reason such great things are done is:

• Excellent high base skills
• Dedication and pride to producing quality
• Love of working in a creative industry
• Desire to be called onto the next project
• Camaraderie and working as a team
• Relatively high income and matching standard of living

At first glance these all seem motivating and good attributes but there is a dark side.

I’m still not sure which way to feel about this and it seems that it may be becoming the standard these days within the industry as the Australian dollar strengthens and production moves away from our shores to cheaper countries but either production companies are incompetent or shrewd, in the way they manage their workforce.

Instead of planning an appropriate timeline and budget, the standard seems to be to have no time, no money but expect outstanding work as would normally be expected with proper preparation, planning and funding.

What has happened of late is we have a third of the prep time and no money to set up workshops or buy materials but production wants all the whiz-bangery that they can think of – So… “Go and make it happen, Oh, and if you have any gear at home you want to bring in feel free as you’ll need it to do your job but we won’t reimburse you as it’s what you need, thanks very much.”

The workshops are makeshift without the proper infrastructure to work efficiently and safely and no preparation or stocking of the most basic materials to create things from. Often the sheds are poorly ventilated, lit and without the necessary equipment but it’s still expected that the work is performed by the deadlines. On this production I saw some of the worst working connotations that I’ve ever seen in all my time in the industry with people performing tasks that will shorten their lives due to dust and chemicals, maybe not today or even this year but it’s accumulative and these technicians were working 12 and 16 hour days for weeks at a time. Reports of people falling asleep driving home were mentioned to me. Production wouldn’t care if someone died (and in productions overseas they have), it would just be that’s a tragic accident but the show must go on, now back to work and keep cracking the whip. The whole project is driven by the accountants with no regard for the greater cost.

The real question is “Why do the workers in the film industry put up with it?”

It’s the same list as above but instead of looking at those points as positive attributes they are actually the shackles that bind people to the production company as wage slaves.

I heard it said around the workshops, “Suck it up and just do your job.” but why? – Because they have no power, they are sold into servitude because of the above list.

They care about their craft and want to do great work out of personal pride. They care so much they will put up with all the difficulties because they are all pulling together to create something bigger than themselves. Something that will show their skills and stay after they are gone. Yea fine, those are some of the idealistic points but it’s more pragmatic also.

They have grown accustomed to the income that can be earnt when you work stupid long hours, often away from home without a break for months and sometimes years at a time. Complete breakdown in a social life with anyone outside of the industry creating a monocultural lifestyle. With that income, their families develop a dependence on a certain lifestyle, mortgage, cars, education… those sorts of things. But the cost is absence from the family and many dysfunctional relationships. Like many industries with similar traits, the film industry is littered with affairs and broken relationships, often due to absence in my view.

There is always a certain desperation in everyone that we have to make good on this production despite any difficulties, not to make waves and show that we are a good little worker bee so that we can milk this production for as much as we can because it won’t last long, they never do and always have a finish date looming and if we are good we’ll get invited back onto the next production. If their is a gap of work between productions (which is the norm) and some lean times this makes things only more desperate. When there is a whisper of a job everyone looks after themselves first, not letting too much be known about it until their position is secure. Then they may help others to be seen as a good guy but really the work is so scarce and desperately needed, due to the commitments that they have created that no real favours are done and it’s every man for himself.

So what we end up with is this cycle of earning good money due to the huge hours, family pressures to maintain that lifestyle, while the family often learns to live without you. When there is no film work, you could be an inconvenience at home because family aren’t used to you being around and as you have no other social life or career prospects the worry of when the next job is going to turn up creates stress. Then when the next production starts there is relief that at least for a time, income is secure and home life goes back to the norm. But it’s necessary to work hard, don’t complain and keep your head down to stay on this production as long as possible and get invited onto the next. The income rolls in the money is spent the lifestyle maintained and the cycle recommences. Desperation and relief, around and around time and again.

So how does production use this to their benefit?

Is production being shrewd or incompetent?

I don’t know if they have no idea what they are doing and we’re picking up the pieces using dedication and skill and they never need to learn how to manage better because they still manage to get the job done on the backs of the technicians but I’ve seen it so many times I’m now thinking it’s an actual strategy by the production. I’m talking about at the very highest levels here not at the level where I could actually ever meet a real, living, breathing person on the ground.

If they (the producers) say we have no money and a ridiculous timeline there is always someone out there who will compromise themselves for “just this one job” and take it on. This goes all the way down to the bottom of the crew. There is always someone who wants to get in the door and bust an arse. Those in the industry see the job start and as I’ve mentioned they’re in this lifestyle/income cycle and have to compromise and take the job, so dispite the lack of time and resources to produce, they collectively suck it up and get to work using their own personal life energy to make up for the discrepenticy of the producers. And the producers know this is what will happen so they plan accordingly. They know that if they screw everyone from start to finish, top to bottom, they will get what they want using those thousands of workers life energy to off set the balance sheet.

What makes me think this?

Well I’ve seen all the above playing out now a few times. Years ago there once was a time when there was great facilities, time and budget to get excellent work done with limited stress. That has not been the case for a few years now.

The main sign though is the apparent compromises that production makes when they push too hard. The problem with this model is sometimes they will be so extreme with budget and timing, things just can’t be done, it breaks down. If the reality was as production have always said, when the deadline arrives or more finances are required and it’s not there, then the whole house of cards would collapse… But No!

Every time we couldn’t deliver on time I saw schedules moved, if we couldn’t find the materials, they would find the money to get more, if we needed to work more or get more staff they always managed to find just enough money to get what was needed done, by the skin of our teeth. Funny that! Doesn’t matter how desperate they said it was, they always managed to find more. They are so deep in the hole they have to and if they can’t it would turn into The Fountain that was six weeks into pre production and was pulled to go overseas. That’s often remembered as a threat.

If things are so bad that the production is going to fail, hiring more help, putting in better dust extraction equipment and allowing people to have some rest wouldn’t be an issue as they’re insignificant, the problems are far bigger than we on the shop floor. The production would fail, simple, that’s bad management and incompetence.

What I think we have here is concerted manipulation to create a sense of lack and desperation to achieve excellent return for minimal outlay. That’s good business I hear you say but it’s on the backs of those who work in the industry, strip mining their personal life energy. Yes I’m talking about people actually dying at a younger age.

If you’re going to say they have a choice. Well, yes and no. There are other jobs out there sure but as I’ve hopefully shown, many of these people have become addicted to the lifestyle and if they do leave, there are always more who are prepared to join the industry and that is what the producers are relying on. There is and will continue to be more people who will choose for whatever reason to throw themselves into the machinery, to grease the wheels of the film industry.

I’ve tired of this cycle now that I can see it for what it has become. I may continue to return to it from time to time for a cash injection but after this post I may well never be invited back because I’m saying the Emperor has no clothes. Unfortunately those who create these issues are at the top of the production and don’t care as they look up from their spreadsheets in their ivory towers. Those I deal with (and that is everyone actually making the film), who are addicted to the lifestyle, would probably rather I don’t mention these points as it’s what’s eating them up inside and they would rather just continue to live the dream. Sadly it a bad dream.

PS I know I’ve made many gross generalisations here. There are always going to be exceptions to everything I’ve said here. There are people with passion and purpose, with balanced lives and great relationships but what I’m expressing is what I’ve observed and from what I’ve seen is the norm albeit a generalisation. To those who have it all together, congratulations and keep an eye on the industry so it doesn’t suck the life out of you.

Picking up from yesterdays post about 2009 and how good a year I had, I thought that it was also appropriate to consider what is ahead for 2010.

Last year I sat down with some serious consideration to goal setting and planning out my year ahead.What I hoped to have for my podcast, income, home and social life. Then as the year wore on I realised that despite my good intentions many other things were being thrown up in my path creating situations that prevented or changed the direction of things that I had set out to achieve. Some improvements some challengers but things that changed where I thought I was travelling, thereby creating a feeling in me that I didn’t have control on my life and frustration that I wasn’t able to make the goals realised as I was told would be achieved if I followed the rules of goal setting. Basically what I’m saying is that the classic western goal setting model doesn’t seem to work for this little black duck.

So as I mentioned in the last post, as I started on this exercise in May to just opt out of what is expected and make my decisions based on what is appropriate in each moment and the relative ease at which my life now seems to be evolving I’ve decided on some new goals for this new year.

• Goal 1 – I intend to be fully engaged with every activity and make any decisions that need to be taken in that moment.
• Goal 2 – Any time I fall into emotional considerations of the future or reminiscences of the past I’ll concentrate on Goal 1.

If you haven’t realised goal 2 is actually a variation on goal 1. It’s just that I’m still not brilliant at this and I sometimes have to remind myself to go to Goal 1.

Oh! and just in case you think this is not, or is a real goal, I don’t mind what happens anyway.

I’m just here Now.

Life is a Game
A Game to be Played
You can never Lose
You can only Win
So long as You Play. ’91

Another year wraps up and I’ve been reflecting on it lately.

Back when I came up with the idea and started Your Story I commented on how the years were all the same and the disappointment that there wasn’t any real change from year to year, of my desire to shake that up. Now it’s now been nearly 3 years.

I didn’t really have any idea what I was doing when I started on this path those few years ago but I knew that I needed to start and see where it would go. The first 15 years of my adult life were wonderful years with a great marriage, adventure and achievements but after that it was particularly tough. Now I can say that of the last 15 years since my marriage went south these last 3 years have been the best, most rewarding and enlightening years.

When my daughter was little I used to say that I was running a one off, 18 year experiment in parenting and I’d get back with the results on whether I achieved anything when she is 18. Now that she is I think that experiment has been very successful but that is another story. Just the same as parenting, this last year I’ve been running another experiment in not planning, not goal setting but

Ian in Buenos AIres

simply going where the moment takes me. It started way back in May when I decided, just for one week to have a Societyfast. What could go wrong for one week of not buying into all the stuff of society?

As it turns out after that week I decided not to reconnect with the system and that’s the way it’s been all year since then. Now I’ve always done things somewhat my own way but this was really ramping it up. I have for the majority of the year slept, worked, danced and travelled as it’s seemed right in the moment. I’ve done my best not to project into the future and reminisce on the past. I have at times been far from perfect from achieving this and I have sometimes bought into fear and sentimentality but generally I’ve been able to reconnect after a time and just enjoy the moment. And what wonderful moments I’ve had.

In the last year I’ve only worked about 10 weeks which has caused me to live very lean but my life is wonderful and rich with friends old and new. I have a wonderful social life thanks to my dancing and all that Tango has given me. I’ve travelled yet again, this time to Buenos Aires. I’ve worked for a time with an artist and on Narnia – The Voyage of the Dawn Treader where I made some wonderful things. The podcast is evolving and I’ve managed to meet and get a whole new level of guests to come onto the show. My skills have continued to improve both with audio and video while some people, though only a few, seem to like what I’m producing and keep coming back.

But most importantly I’ve discovered that if I take the time, to take no time, to just be in the moment and make decisions on what needs to be done now and follow that quiet feeling inside me that says that I should do … right now it all seems to work out. Leave my petty ego out of it and be content with whatever happens whether it’s others or my doing doesn’t matter. Instead of worrying I’m starting to have an attitude that something will happen, it’s just that I don’t know what it is. This is creating a new state of wonder, where I don’t know what is going to happen but like watching a film I’m curious and wonder what will evolve. Amazingly it’s working out different and much better than I could imagine.

Yes, what will come of the New Year. I wonder because I have no idea.

Lets find out…

I’ve finished work a while back on the Narnia movie again. I was initially on for a month, which is where I wrote the previous post, then off for a month, then back on for 2.5 weeks and now yet again I’ve not worked for a few weeks. Since I finished up I’ve been thinking about

Book Stands for the Movie

this crazy life of mine and how it flies in the face of the Western method of work, whether it’s valid or irresponsible of me, if I’m burning my bridges for my future or if maybe I may actually have something here.

When I finished I knew I had to do the whole readjust again back into the mental head-space of just hanging out doing my thing again. It’s very easy to plug into work, as once I’m on a Job there is a first morning where I get up and head off to another first day and from then on it’s routine. The longer I work in that one place the more ingrained the routine becomes and the more comfortable it all is. That is until the routine becomes boredom. Then another type of stress starts where I question my existence and waste of life in that environment and yet again I have to leave to find myself.

That is very much the way it is for most of the permanent work that I’ve done and the great advantage of working contract is that normally I can stick it out long enough until the project is complete which hopefully isn’t too long and then I get the change that I need. So film work often suits me well in this regard.

Finishing and readjusting to no work is not as easy as compared to starting as I don’t have the distractions that work gives me from what I call the “Void” or “Nothing”. However there are two ways to approach this.

1. Get another Job is what everyone asks and expects. In a lot of ways that is the easiest option. But for me after all these years of doing the variations on this lifestyle I know that it will go the way that I’ve outlined above. Normally six months and I’m a spent force, bored and ready to move on. It even tends to manifest in physical disturbances in my body brought on by the low but permanent levels of stress.
2. Embrace the Void. Now it’s not exactly Nothing. It’s not as though I wake up sit down and do nothing until I go back to sleep that night as I have my personal projects and day to day order to keep functioning so there is a whole range of activities and a constant supply of new and interesting opportunities turning up daily to keep me active. However compared to the 40 hour week, 48 week year work model it appears to be a void that requires filling.

The challenges with embracing the Void is that there is no order projected onto the future, no planning and no surety. It’s very much living in the moment and taking the opportunities as they arrive on a moment by moment time frame. That flies in the face of the Western model of how to get things done. I’m supposed to have lists, goals, plans for what I want to achieve and a step by step approach to achieving them. I’ve read the books on goal setting and that’s the way they say to achieve what your after. Sure that’s the model and if you have a specific goal that is what you do to achieve it, I get that.

But what if you haven’t the goal at the moment?

For the last couple of years my podcast Your Story has been a goal, a huge goal, to get the knowledge and have a production model in place but I never knew what I was going to do with it beyond getting it up and running and hoping that some opportunities may come of it. So I’ve been working at learning everything I needed to get it going but now that’s been achieved it’s bubbling along and I don’t have the next step.

Welcome to the Void, Ian.

The easy fix as mentioned above and the one recommended by all is to go get a job and for two reasons.

Money and activity.

The number of people who say it must be good to have this free lifestyle or it must be good to have money, as they say they would like to not have to work but they need to, as they need the income, they need the money to maintain the lifestyle.

• Let’s look at the obvious side of this first – Money.

Are we addicted to the money and income from our work?

I think most people would agree that the answers is yes. Most don’t realise that the addiction is based on having an income to support a lifestyle that is far in excess of what is necessary. They scream that they want the “stuff”. You know the “stuff”… It’s all that consumer stuff that we surround ourselves with, from the house and car to the holidays and widgets. It includes everything beyond our base needs. Everything that the advertisers throw at us but more insidiously it’s the subtle daily reminders that to be a person of respect in our society (and just look at the business and social pages in the paper to understand this) you need to have a style and attitude the requires all the “stuff”. These are the things that identify you to the rest of society and you need to surround yourself with them at any cost and the cost is debt and/or work very hard to generate the income.

This is not to say live in a cave with only the basics to have a good life but do you really need all of that “stuff”? Do you constantly have to upgrade as soon as the next version of it comes out? If the answers is yes then you need to fund the never ending need for those consumables and there is always more “stuff” coming on the market to necessitate the increase in your income – consume, consume, consume. It never ends.

I know that many would say that they are only just getting by on the minimum of what they can afford with no luxuries and that is valid. They are trapped by this system of the things that they must have or are expected to have. The biggest of these for the average family but far from not the only, is the cost of housing. Once a mortgage is activated you are indentured to the system to work as a wage slave for the duration of this debt with rent being no different. However by todays standards we need far more than in the minimum. Our grand parents were happy with far less.

A few years ago I went against the grain and didn’t get myself into huge debt to purchase another property as I realised that I would have to flog myself just to maintain the mortgage by being in this exact situation. Instead I still live in my humble two bedroom unit and I have a small investment unit in the same block. When I say humble I mean very humble, these units are 49 square metres but in the wonderful suburb of West End in Brisbane. I have an old car that is cheap to maintain and run but with most things local I use it minimally. I have a simple frugal life with little that I need additional to my current situation. I have a small income from the investment unit that pays for itself and a little left over towards my other bills so in effect I need just a few hundred dollars a week to live my life. With a cash injection as I’ve just had from the film work I can often survive for several weeks before I start to run lean on funds.

The stuff that I have in my life above the basics of life are by the standards of our society few. I don’t need a large income to maintain it. This enables me to have this life where I’m not always chasing the almighty dollar and can spend time on more important things instead of work, like Life.

• This brings me to the second of the two reasons for having work – Activity.

Everyone complains about work and how good it would be to not have to do it but

Go for a Walk

the reality is that once you do unplug from the workforce there is a desire, almost a need to stay active. Sure sitting on a beach for a few weeks may sound fine but once you’ve done that it starts getting boring. If you have been spending half of you waking life working, with the rest doing the functional support things, once work is removed there is a huge void that requires filling. In not too many weeks most people find the desire to return to work in order to have activity. Work here I include as self employment, study as well as working for others but also hobbies and recreations that keep a person active. Also our society demands that we are working to play our part to support the system, if we’re not we’re said to be sponging off the system.

What Do You Do?

The number one question asked when people meet and start a conversation is “What do you do?”

This is where work is your identifier. It could be a way of pegging you in someones memory when they meet you but then the question could just as easily be “Where did you go for your last holiday?”

The reason the work question is so good is it places you in the pecking order of society, where your value as a member of it. Work defines you by what you do and how you do it not to mention how much money/stuff you have and if you wish to be a valued member of that society you’ll feel the need to play the game according to the rules as laid out above. Notoriety, affluence and stuff. We use the work standard for as a quick measure of that and we feel the pressure to strive towards meeting those requirements.

Nothing.

What about if you have nothing to do for a period of time. You have enough basics to keep going for a time, there are no goals to achieve and there are no desires for stuff. What then?

What about the idea of doing nothing unless something, i.e. desires or needs, comes along? Just wait until then.

Our society says that we can’t do that, we can’t do nothing, we have to do something… anything!

After all we have all these things to worry about in the future that we have to prepare for/against. So even if you don’t want to, go and do anything, it’s necessary to stash away more “stuff” for the future. Actually, while your at it get a bigger, better, faster “thing”and before long you trapped into the cycle where you have to work to keep the cycle going.

What about winding the cycle in the opposite direction. As you acquire the things you need to support the basics of life wind back the effort that you need to get anything that isn’t necessary. Sure get the house, but one that is adequate, no more than is required and once you have it, there is less of a need to work as much creating space in you life. Have a modest vehicle. Go on good value holidays but the whole time only as much as you need. Eventually there is a point reached where there is no  need to be working as much with more time available and there is nothing to do. You have it all, no need to buy more and it’s time to stop.

A lot of the activity that we do is like the things we buy, it’s “stuff”. It’s just the noise that we generate so that we have something to do. Could there be an alternative? How about doing Nothing… Yes actually doing Nothing as an activity. What I mean here is if there is nothing to do, not creating noise by creating an activity of stuff but just being quiet and doing Nothing! Sit, stand or lie and wait in the void doing No Thing.

Nothing

Doing nothing to such an extent that there is not even a desire to do anything just to create some noise, to not do Any-Thing but to do No-Thing. Just simply being in the moment allowing the constant stream of time to wash over.

Then at some stage there is an urge to do something, not out of a reason to create a distraction from the void but additional to the void, so do it. It could be anything as simple as changing physical position to starting a project that lasts a life time.

The difference to the Western model of work is that it is not out of a need to generate the income to get the stuff and it’s not in order to create a busy mind through activity. It’s the thing that needs to be done now, because it feels like the correct thing to do. So it’s done now.

Way back in 2001-2002 I was lucky enough to work on The Matrix 2&3.

Some of the work that I’m most proud of is the sequence for the Hell Coat Check where we built the foam columns that had explosives to create the bullet hits and the impact wall at the end of the sequence.
Here it is.